You found out that your ring or wristwatch is gone. You don't suspect your six year old. For goodness sake, he's still a baby! Besides, he has his own kiddie wristwatch. But when you find your passport wallet in his school bag, you panic. Your child is stealing from you! How could this happen?
You shouldn't worry about your child becoming a criminal when he becomes an adult because stealing is always an experience every child goes through. Everybody at one point in their lives has stolen from their parents, siblings, and schoolmates. It could be motivated by loneliness or the need to have the things he cannot buy. They steal crayons and candies while the older ones pilfer cash from their parent's leather money clip.
Children under the age of six steal because they do not understand why it is wrong to get things that belong to another. They cannot comprehend the idea of "yours" and "mine." If they want something, they must have it. They get the things they want without being furtive about it.
Likewise, if they admire an older sibling's favorite gadget or a parent's personalized business card holder, they'll take it, not because they want these things, but they want to be like the people they admire.
Educate Not Scold
If you catch your preschooler, wearing your ring your child wants to be like you. It is not the ring that fancies him, but you should call his attention that the ring is yours not his. Scolding him without spelling things out will humiliate him, not teach him why what he has done is not right.
Should this habit continues despite your efforts and your child starts to take money from your leather money clip, it is time to dig deeper to find out why. Children who feel they are neglected or lonely often resort to stealing. This is a cry for help, and you should step in with loving understanding.
If you feel inadequate to deal with the situation, seek professional help. A child counselor can nip in the bud kleptomaniac tendencies.
All right, doctors get the plum prize. They belong to the $100K+ a year club. But look at what they have to do to get there - 8 years of college in a good university, years of internship and the tough prospect of facing a medical board exam before becoming a full-pledge doctor. This takes rough sailing before you can think of ring bearer gifts.
But there are college degrees that won't break your back paying off those college debts. A bachelor's degree can earn you tons of money and engraved pocket watches in software engineering, fashion design and as a police supervisor. All told, you get that cushy job in just four years, though it would push your career up the ladder if you have a post graduate degree, but that can come later.
Community College
The local community college offers the chance to get a regular four year college degree. If you enlist in a 2 year course of your choice, you can get a job immediately after and go back to a regular college for a bachelor's degree after you've saved up enough money for a formal IT course or any course you fancy.
Online College Degrees
Think online college degrees. If you are already working but want a college degree check out the options online. Colleges and universities have online education sites for those who prefer to get a degree in engineering, nursing, IT, and fashion design during their off hours.
Before queuing for an online degree, you should know that employers are rather wary of online degrees thinking that these are not good as traditional college diplomas. But this opinion will change in time. Schools and universities worldwide are offering this opportunity for anybody who wants a college degree but don't have the time to go back to school.
Studying online can help you manage your time and money and avoid those costly education bills you'll have to pay when you get your first fat pay. But by this time, you'll be enjoying plans for a nice little wedding and shopping for mantel clocks and other wedding trappings.
Body language reveals what you are feeling but your handwriting discloses how your brain works. Handwriting analysts also add that your handwriting divulges your personality type by the way you cross your Ts and how you style your loops. Observe how you cross your Ts when you are using Cross Pens or any other pen for that matter.
If you cross your T after you write the complete word or cross your T before you go to the next letter you give yourself away. Crossing the T after completing the word shows you are patient and too careful and awfully hard to convince; but if you cross your T before the next letter, you personify the type who always hurries and not afraid of risks.
If your Ts have long crosses and you have leather briefcases, you are demanding and overbearing. Short crosses intimate that you're timid or very careful of your possessions. Just by watching your friends cross their Ts, you can judge for yourself if they fit the prototype.
Your Loops
Narrow loops for long but straight letter l belong to people who follow rules and they expect people to do the same. They are preoccupied with details and they take their sweet time before they can accomplish any tasks. Rounded loops, whether long or short, reveals artistic inclination, laziness (sometimes) and generosity. These people are generous with their feelings and their money.
Avoid people who write short narrow loops and an engraved business card holder because they are secretive and suspicious. In love, they are never affectionate but well, they are good secret keepers. Short but rotund loops reflect a kind heart, and person who avoids conflict. They are loyal and make good friends, but they will not hesitate to put you in your proper place.
Your Cross Pens
Watch people who use gold fountain pens; they love everything classic but will not hesitate to experiment. But a person with a silver pen is conservative and stays in the background. The opposite is true with individuals who go for floral designs. They always want to get ahead in everything they do.
A "new" BMW M6 has been added to your neighbor's garage and you're wondering how on earth is he able to afford those cars? Last year, he parked a coupe on the driveway, and the other year a Dodge. Now a BMW M6! He must be onto something and he's keeping mum about it.
Haven't you heard of police car auctions? Yes, you read it right, police car auctions. Every month hundreds of cars are impounded by the police. These cars figure in local crimes or are abandoned for unknown reasons and no owner goes looking for their cars. The police auctions off hundreds of cars periodically instead of letting these cars go to rust.
Hundreds of cars from SUVs, to vans and truck of all make and models are auctioned off. Your neighbor got that BMW for $1,600 and that's several fractions off the actual cost of the car. But if you are lucky you can get a high performance car for less than that if you bid your way around smartly (or get it as groomsman gifts!).
Now that you know, start getting those local dailies and scan for police car auctions in your locality or in the nearest county. If there is a scheduled auction, go and take a look so you can get the feel of the process. Once you've educated yourself with the basics of the auctions, start saving those dollars in your money clip wallet for the best car deal of your life and your neighbor's closed guarded secrets are closed guarded secrets no more.
Preparing for the Auction
Before the auction, decide what type of car you need and settle on a budget. This way you won't waste your time looking for the car, remember there will be hundreds of cars up for grabs. In the first place, you are at the auction to buy a specific car, not liquor flasks, within your means.
Call the police department holding the auction and ask for details and check if the type of car you want is available. Also, bring a loaded money clip wallet and an experienced mechanic if you are not with car troubles.
The announcement of a wedding is a prelude to an excited flurry of activities but not all couples make it to the altar date because someone opts out after some soul searching. This is a dilemma because of the humiliation and pain it will bring; and whoever wants out suffers too.
If your fiancé wants out, it would be hard for him to tell it straight like it is because he knows how much this will hurt you and your families. Instead of talking things out, he will behave differently, much to your dismay.
He will evade your questions but his actions will speak for him. If he used to be affectionate, and made jokes about the groomsman gift you have bought together, he'll be distant and remote the next moment. He will call to say he's sorry and promise he'll call that night, but he didn't. If he takes to drink and becomes testy when you ask him what's wrong, you have a problem on your hands.
Opt in or Opt Out?
True, the wedding invitations have been sent out and some of the money you have advanced for the ring bearer gifts may not be fully refunded; but these things can be dealt with; the issue is your feelings; but being dumped now by a fiancé is better than being betrayed and divorced by a husband later.
If your fiancé explains he is just jittery, consider that. But if his behavior of loving you one moment and ignoring you for the next few days has put you off, take it as a sign that this man can treat you much worse when you are married.
If the only thing holding you back from calling off the wedding is the shame of it all and the loss of the money advanced for the wedding expenses, you are risking your future. Follow that persistent voice at the back of your head that is telling you to get out fast. You can give him the engraved pocket watches you have bought so let him take the "spoils" of war and run for your life.
Everything happens for a reason, and these things happen at the right time. If there is a time to grieve for a lost love, then there must be a time to let go of the people you love because clinging to a dying relationship can only make matters worse. But when do you let go of someone who no longer needs or desires your friendship or love?
If a potential break-up is looking at you in the face, there is this tendency to believe otherwise. You ignore the signs and plod on, dragging the carcass of love. You continue to talk about marriage plans, your wedding gown, and the personalized Zippo as groomsman gift you think your partner would like for his friends. When the bubble bursts, you are still surprisingly caught flat-footed.
Had you heeded the warning signs you could have saved yourself a lot of pain. The trouble of the trouble is you want the relationship to go on but your partner wants out and the more you hang on the more he resists, and the more you suffer.
Why You Should Let Go
There are myriads of reasons why you should let go. The first is to salvage your self esteem. If your man continuously cheats on you and verbally and physically abuses you, why are you hanging on? Do you blame yourself for his abusive behavior towards you that's why you stay on? It's time you let go of your dependence on the relationship. Letting go here is the ultimate act of self love.
Sometimes, it's the other way around. You can be the abusive partner and your man stays put. No matter how mean you are, he continues to be a yes man. But you can't always have a good thing going - some things have to end. Your man will leave you yet. Perhaps you can salvage the situation by letting go of your controlling ways and constant nagging.
You should let go to give yourself a fresh start or give the relationship another try if it is your ways that needs mending and if your man still cares deeply about you. Letting go of your negative attitude is your love sacrifice to reap love's rewards. Then you can go on planning your wedding and the cigarette cases to buy.
The Most Difficult Chase
No one knows your Ex like you do and if the urge to get him back is so strong, your briefcase for women knows what game plan to execute. You know he loves himself too much, wants what he does not have, and hates to be controlled. These universal human traits can be manipulated for your ends and knowing him that intimately, you know what weapons to use against him.
Certainly, you won't shower him with designer wallets just now. The very act smacks of desperation. No girl, you have to play it cool and act as if he is the least important Homo sapiens in the planet. This means distancing yourself from him, staying pretty and attractive without having to dye your hair orange and if he flirts around, react as it's the best sight in the world to behold even if you want to scratch his eyes out.
He'll be puzzled and irked that you're not acting like a desperate shrew and he'll start thinking if he made a mistake leaving you. Hooray! He expected you to tail him, clutch at him, call him day and night, and go running to his family and friends playing the tragic Ophelia act, short of drowning yourself in the tub crammed with peonies and lilacs.
What Your Chase is All About
Getting back your Ex is actually about reclaiming your place in his heart. You can have him back in your life anytime, but will he still have that space in his heart that was once your exclusive domain? That is the essence of everything when working to get your Ex back. His love or nothing. So go girl, on the double!
Take the middle road. Grovel at his feet and he will abhor you; roar like a lion and he'll run away. Play the ingénue and he'll feel safe you're not after him. But if he does not respond the way you expect him to, give it one more go but let go if it there is nothing in it anymore, like those empty laptop briefcases he left behind.
November 4, 2008 - He's Younger You're Older, Is It Still a Match Made in Heaven?
Not Too Long Ago
He was 23 and you were 40. He was young and handsome and the most sought after bachelor in town. But you pursued him relentlessly and finally bagged the trophy. If this is a match made in heaven then this is not a desperate act of insanity. But by the time he is 35, you are 52. The age gap begins to show, and how.
Unless again, your young stalwart is madly in love with you, he will not hesitate to let the world know that the tottering old lady is his wife. But if he'd rather not be seen with you, then the match made in heaven becomes a match made in hell. Your trophy is no more, but a pain in the heart.
Men his age start to suffer spot baldness and experience a thickening in the waist. They become insecure about their physical attraction and start looking around if anybody will have them. In your case, boy toy hubby will be looking elsewhere not at the woman content watching old reruns of "I Love Lucy."
If You Can't Risk It, Then Don't
Change his style he will and become a total stranger. The engraved Colibri lighter you gave him eons ago will take a break. Poor old you will be experiencing the worst nightmare of a May-December marriage.
If you are attracted to man who is half your age, do not listen to the whispers of your inflated ego. Fast forward to twenty years ahead. Can you still take it if you are already arthritic and he still athletic?
Think of competition, all of them will be younger than you are and much younger than he his. Do you think you can still chance it? If you can't, do not risk it. Stay away from this young man who is smart as whip and handsome to boot because he's a potential heart shredder. Give that engraved flasks and Zippos to someone else who is nearer your age or one who is older than you are, and age gracefully with a marriage match made in heaven.
Spending 80 hours a week holed up in your office gives you more time getting to know your co-workers; this enhances your professional rapport with the bunch. But over time, you start getting to know your co-workers better, and before you know it, the professional relationship you shared with one becomes intimate. Suddenly you feel giddy with love, and your briefcase becomes the storehouse of little love notes, as well as business card holders.
There are a thousand or so articles telling you to drop the romance. Those articles are not at all baseless. True, the few weeks of the relationship might boost your productivity. You find yourself getting to work earlier. Your energy levels are up and you are constantly cheerful and easier to work with; it is not surprising you are questioning the dire warnings of office romance articles; after all, your office romance is not bad thing, just the opposite.
But a few months into the relationship, small arguments become magnified. Personal conflicts make professional life awkward; in the same way, professional disagreements affect your personal relationship. In a romantic relationship, angry emotions are hard enough to keep in check and adding both your egos into the drama makes things even worse.
Tips to Go
The decision to get into a relationship with a work colleague is yours because ultimately, you know what is best for yourself. These tips might help you see the better perspective before heading hastily into a romantic relationship at work: * Check your company' allows dating between co-workers, and superiors and subordinates. Most companies have formal policies regarding the matter. * Be considerate of your colleagues. Consider how they will react and how your romance might affect your professional relationship with them. * Be discreet. If you want to avoid workplace gossip, keep your relationship to yourselves. * Be the professional that you are. Even when your relationship comes out in the open, avoid public displays of affection.
But whatever you decide to do, always keep your heart in check and organize your thoughts the way you organize the stuff in your engraved money clip. Just like any relationship, there are no guarantees to a happily-ever-after.
Who loves hand-me-downs? Not you nor them; but when the once-loved rejects are stuff that have eternal appeal like a vintage leather attaché case, a 1960s buckled boots, or an ounce of the remains of a Clive Christian No. 1 in a more regular bottle, you'll drool. But if you are stuck with a three legged sofa way past its prime and your older sister's bland outfits, you can only implore the heavens to save you from another similar fate.
If you hate hand-me-downs, be aware that there are hand-me-downs that are more terrible. These are not the stuff you usually deplore; remember the two year pants of an older sibling who was then a head shorter than you were? You had no choice but to wear it!
The hand-me-downs syndrome seem to run in large families, but it is also encroaching on smaller family groups; with spiraling prices and job cuts running wild, the hand-me-down tradition is getting off the ground again.
Disastrous Legacies
Each generation passes on to the next its heritage. The next generation will be living the same old conflicts, passions, and fears. They will get new downloads, new hatreds and new passions. This time though there's a new threat added to the mixed bag - a toxic environment. The next generation will have to live with it or put things right.
How about you? What are you going to pass on to your children? How about the lessons you learned? But will the next generation learn from the present mistakes? Will your children rather save their money to buy their homes, or get a mortgage they cannot afford and start the motions of another recession? Some things never change at all.
The children of the future will be smoking, drinking, driving under the influence, battling credit card woes, and go to war. They will also love the same things, expensive suits, jewelry, the imported rolling briefcase, and business card holders. They will also want peace, love and hope. How about sending them off on the right path so the old conflicts and fears won't rear their ugly heads in the future?
September 4, 2008 - Groomsmen Gifts for the Gross Groomsmen
You expect your groomsmen to be the ideal groomsmen – helpful in putting your wedding preparations in order, talk you through cold feet, usher in bridal party to their church seats, deliver a good speech without malicious and salacious overtones, danced with the bridesmaid and generally just be there to support you.
You can include pictures of the groomsman making a jackass of himself during the wedding reception. You can solicit for pictures of him vomiting from too much drinking, sexually harassing the bridesmaids, and engaging in raucous behavior. For added effect, you can also put in a transcript of his speech that caused shudders and cringes from the audience.
You will be spending more on the pictures and the transcription but at least you will be telling him in no uncertain terms your displeasure at his behavior.
Zippo Lighters with a Zip
Zippo lighters can be personalized. If you can find somebody who can compose a few words that delicately straddle the fine line between expressing disappointment over bad behavior and saying thank you anyway, then better for you. Or you can just engrave “J.A.” instead of his initials and let him figure out the rest.
If you can find a Zippo with the drawing of a camel on it, that will also do. Why? Camels are not known for their delicacy of movement, which aptly describes his bad behavior.
Engravable Cufflink with a Bite
And bite they will when you engrave it with other than his initials! You can always chalk it up to a mistake of the manufacturer/supplier when in fact it was a deliberate attempt at marking the cuff link with “SOB”. Of course, that is not subtle but neither was he, right?
On a more serious note, these gift ideas might cost you a friendship. You can always tell your groomsman directly to his face about your displeasure. After all, you did choose him because you trusted him as a friend and as such, it is implied that you can talk as friends can. When you do sort through your issues, the above mentioned gifts can be a source of laughter.
September 4, 2008 - Crazy Jobs You Still Need Custom Business Card Holders For
There are jobs and there are crazy jobs. Indeed, it appears that man’s imaginative powers to come up with bizarre jobs remains inexhaustible regardless of the seemingly inexorable computerization and robotization of human industry.
Unlike ordinary jobs, these crazy jobs make for very interesting business cards encased in equally very remarkable custom business card holders. It makes for good conversational starters on first dates though.
Odor Judgers
These people literally use their noses for a living. And it is not good smells either though it is definitely for a good cause – the salvation of the world from smelly armpits and bad breaths.
Depending on the industry you are in, you might be asked to smell armpits for deodorant companies, people’s mouth for oral hygiene product manufacturers, pets’ breaths for pet care businesses, and worse, analyzing flatulence for scientists and smelling used paper towels. Now, if only you can avoid retching from all the bad smells and setting fire to the flatulence with your engraved Zippo lighters, all will be right with your world.
Barnyard Masturbator
Of all the crazy jobs, this might be the craziest yet. You have to assist barnyard animals masturbate in order to collect semen for insemination purposes, which is necessary in the light of supply and demand for steaks and milk.
If you have not enjoyed the benefits of human masturbation, then you will be grossed out from the job. You have three options – shove an electric probe inside the animal’s rectum; thrust an artificial vagina into the animal’s natural penis; and manual stimulation of the nether regions.
Imagine, how your business card will read like when it says: Barnyard Masturbator”! How about settling for “Animal Researcher” instead?
Chick Sex Sorters
Imagine sorting through thousands of chicks and segregating them by sex on a daily basis. By the time you punch your card on your first day on the job, you would most likely have new appreciation for chicks of the human kind.
Imagine how human chicks will react to your business card – “Chick Sex Sorter” – with either incredulous expressions or insane laughter. You would come off as bizarre, at the very least. How about going for “Poultry Specialist”?
These crazy jobs makes you wish you could take on jobs that allow you to wear engravable cufflinks without fear of losing them somewhere in an animal’s rectum. Then again, each job has its compensation. Who gets to know individuals up close and personal with their armpits and mouths, right?
September 4, 2008 - There’s Lacy Underwear and Then There’s Leather Lingerie
Lacy underwear spells sweet femininity, gentle touches, and wispy dreams. When you see a beautiful woman in lacy bra and panties, you think of woman at her most powerful, woman at her most beautiful, and woman at her most feminine aspects. Of course, you can always say that it is woman at her most sinful but that is a matter of perspective.
Most women subscribe to lacy underwear with silk and satin components. However, there are women who love leather lingerie and it is one that you should explore, too!
The Appeal of Leather
Leather is associated with two extremes. The first are the leather briefcases-toting professionals whose leather passport holders, leather padfolios and leather envelopes (all of which you can have by clicking here) mean money business. The second are the leather-clad individuals whose lifestyle require leather clothing and leather lingerie; think big-bikers and sexual adventurers who mean honey business.
Indeed, the appeal of leather crosses boundaries.
The Seduction of Leather Lingerie
Lest you think that leather lingerie does not lend itself well to femininity, of course it does! However, where lacy underwear is to sweet, leather lingerie is to severe and where lacy underwear is to seductive submission, leather lingerie is to seductive domination. In all instances, woman is powerful.
When you want to feel sweet sexy, you put on lacy lingerie. When you want to feel rebelliously sexy, you don leather lingerie. If clothes make the man, then lingerie makes the woman!
If your worry is comfort and convenience, leather lingerie is as comfortable as lacy lingerie. It is not as if you will be subjecting your nether regions to the rough patches of untanned leather! Leather lingerie is usually made of man-made materials like vinyl and Lycra, which gives it a very bright and shiny finish. Imagine shining in your underwear!
Besides, leather lingerie can be combined with your favorite lace. Or if you want, you can trim it in fur and other diaphanous materials for a completely smashing look! If your partner does not appreciate the change in you, then he should be tied up in bondage equipment and left to mull over his mistake.
That or you can whip him into submission, figuratively speaking of course. You don’t want a battered husband on your hands!
September 4, 2008 - Never Bring Leather Wallets to a Séance!
A séance can take you into another realm, literally and figuratively. How does speaking to the dead, corporeal possessions by the deceased and physical manifestations of the spirit world appeal to you? If these appeal to your eerily adventurous side, then a séance it is!
You Are Not Alone
If you believe that the spirit world and the physical world are connected across the death divide, you are not alone in your belief. Notable individuals like Abraham Lincoln, Mackenzie King and Arthur Conan Doyle professed a belief in spiritualism and have attended séances during their time.
There are even scientists who have become avowed “séance-tists”! You can count Guglielmo Marconi, Alexander Graham Bell and John Logie Baird as among this select group of scientific minds who believed in the séance minds of the likes of Cora Hatch.
Frauds and Fakes
Of course, just because these famous personalities believe that séances are real does not necessarily mean that all séances and mediums are real! You have to exercise extreme caution when it comes attending séances as there are fraudulent sessions and fake mediums. The great Houdini himself made it his life’s work to expose these crooks!
That being said, there are certain attitudes to bring into a séance session, such as an open mind, an open heart and open eye. More importantly, leave your negative energies behind.
You also need to leave certain things behind. For one, leave your children and your pets where they cannot disturb the session. For another, leave your wallets behind be it your men’s wallets, leather wallets and especially your magic wallet , which you can get by clicking here. Why?
Your wallets can be surreptitiously stolen from you, during which any information about you and the deceased you want to speak with can be gleaned by the medium’s assistant. Your birth date and birth place can be gathered from your ID and you will be surprised that the medium knows about it!
The picture of the beloved deceased you are hoping to communicate with can be stolen from your wallets. You will then be amazed that the medium accurately described him to the last mole on his face!
Besides, it would not do to pay more than what is necessary just because you were careless to leave your wallet behind or you were ignorant about the stealing of both information and money from your wallet.
Remember that then as now, séance trickery abounds. Like magicians, fake mediums use sleights of hand and theatrical tricks to fool people. Sometimes, it is better to let the dead rest in peace.
Oh, if only we can stop the hands of time on your designer Howard Miller clocks! We would go back to the time when we walked away from the love of our lives and refused to do something we should have done. Most of all, we wish to turn back the hands of time simply because we are faced by our mortality each day that goes by.
What’s The Fuss?
It seems that mankind has always sought to be immortal, in one way or another. For the Buddhists, it is amata; for the Harry Potter types, it is the philosopher’s stone; and for the realist, it is fame.
You will understand why immortality is desirable. You can rectify your past mistakes, seek redress for injustices committed, realize your fullest potential, and remain forever young. Who would not want that?
Well, I for one do not want immortality. What would I do for the rest of my life anyway? There is only so much that you could and should know about life and the universe before you either become crazy or become a god!
Physical life is finite for us human beings. This is a fact that we must accept. We should not be making a big fuss about physical aging but instead we should focus our energies on making the most of our mortal time and aging as gracefully as we can.
What’s Aging Gracefully?
Now that you have accepted that all the clocks in the world (and that includes your assortment of mantel clocks and decorative wall clock, which you can get by clicking here) will not stop their relentless onward ticking, you need to learn to age gracefully. Here’s how in a nutshell:
Dress and act appropriately. You might still want to be a biker chick at 70 but do you look the part? Does your body still look good in leather?
Continue dreaming your dreams and working towards its realization. Just because you are of retirement age does not necessarily mean that you cannot learn the skill you wanted to learn but never had the time.
Balance acting your age with achieving your dreams. Remember that age takes a toll on our bodies; climbing Mt. Everest might not be for you at 70.
Live each day like it was your last. A little kindness will go a long way!
When aging becomes your friend, you will find that it is not as scary as you made it out to be. Well, at least I have made peace with my age!
September 4, 2008 - The Most Unfortunate Names That Will Cause You to Say “What the Hell?
Arguably, parents only have the best intentions when naming their children. Well, at least those were in the good old days when you can call your children home in a voice loud enough to wake the dead and your neighbor’s dog. In those days, you have to practice shouting from the backdoor the name of your future child and see how that fits with the rest of the neighborhood. Try calling for Sex Fruit against Jim and you will settle for the latter.
Still, some parents never learn but instead inflict undue pain on their children. They have the mistaken belief that unique names amount to unique personalities, never realizing until it is too late that only unstinting mortification comes with the name.
Celebrity Names Gone Wrong
Celebrities seem to believe that they have every right to name their children within the bounds of artistic license. When you come to think of it, sadistic license is more like it.
Fifi Trixibell, daughter of Bob Geldof and Paula Yates. Gee, yikes. For the ordinary person like you and me, these two words aptly sum it up. Gee, why did you name your child after a dog? Yikes, you chose a name that Michael Jackson would have used what with his obsession with Peter Pan and Neverland!
Sage Moonblood, son of Sylvester Stallone. Is this homage to the first Rambo movie? An herb-inspired name? No wonder Sage Moonblood now only appears in exploitation films since the opening credits alone would have caused incredulity in serious moviegoers!
Names That Go Bong in the Night
When the parents of these children named them, they must have been in the midst of paroxysms of ecstasy or agony or both. Either that or they have had their heads knocked right off their necks during the night.
Tallulah Does the Hula from Hawaii, who fortunately had the law on her side. Why punish your child with bad rhymes?
Sex Fruit, who must have hated his name so much that John Doe would have been exceedingly preferable.
Just imagine if you collect personalized Zippos like military Zippos lighters and even the inevitable but interestingly-designed cheap Zippos lighter and you have a name like one of these! (All items of which you can get, by the way, by clicking on the link)
It must take a hell of a lot of explaining to do! Better go by the initials, eh? Unless, your initials are something even more embarrassing.
September 4, 2008 - Zap Dry Lips But Not Your Zippos and Pucker Up!
Unless you belong to Inuit tribes who kiss with their noses, your dry lips should be cause for concern in your life. (By the way, if it is still Eskimo to you, better shift to Inuit lest you find yourself at the hunting end of a harpoon or in the midst of politically incorrect ignorance, both of which often mean the same thing) Let’s face it. Your smoking can aggravate your dry lips but there is hope for you yet.
Zap Dry Lips, Keep Zippos
When I say keep your Zippos, I mean you can keep on smoking if you really have to. You definitely cannot be faulted for your decision especially when you have Zippos, cigar accessories and designer Colibri items to keep you looking smokin’ hot!
However, the trade off is you get dry lips. This is not particularly good for puckering up and smooching with your dates, which if you have the right words and the right moves you would be doing lots of times (and not just kisses on the nose!)
And admit it. As much as you do not like to smooch dry, chapped lips of ‘em ladies, you do not want to be accused of having the gall to kiss with dry, chapped puckers either! So, how do you keep ‘em lips soft and supple?
Manly Cosmetic Solutions
Okay, not every man is up to being the quintessential metrosexual. However, you can zap your dry lips even when you are one of those 1 pack a day smokers without sacrificing your sense of manliness. Here’s how:
Whatever you do, don’t lick your dry lips! Sure, you will feel momentary relief from dryness but it will only aggravate the condition. Instead, use an alcohol/petroleum-free lip balm constantly but discreetly. You do not want to be seen as abandoning your manliness for feminine habits, do you? Besides, there are lip balms that do not leave shiny residues. Ask your friendly neighborhood pharmacist.
Eat foods rich in iron, B vitamins and fatty acids. If you can, eat more of your vegetable and fruits and just obey your mother even when you are all grown up now.
Remove dead skin cells on your lips by softly brushing them with a soft-bristled toothbrush.
Avoid the sun and the wind as much as you can.
Now that you have soft and supple lips, it is time to learn how to kiss passionately but this is not the blog for that. Maybe next time.
September 4, 2008 - Of Leather Fetishes and Leather Padfolios
Usually, fetishism has sexual connotations. In a study of 48 cases of sexual fetishism in a teaching hospital, patients were erotically obsessed with clothing, rubber, footwear, body parts, and leather. Indeed, each to his own!
Fortunately, there are fetishes that are not sexual in nature. You might say that collectors of various items who rabidly accumulate the objects of their affection regardless of cost are fetishists. For example, Imelda Marcos has a fetish for shoes as exemplified by her collection of a thousand shoes (and from whence came the term “imeldific” denoting ostentatious extravagance).
Leather Lust (or Love)
Just what is it about leather that inspires men and women to love them? Is it the smooth feel of leather under your fingertips? Is it the sight of beautifully tanned leather in rich colors? Is it the sound of leather rubbing against your skin? Is it the smell of newly-tanned leather that can even be found in perfumes?
Whatever it is that draws us to leather, it cannot be denied that we simply cannot have enough of it! Fortunately, you can indulge in your leather fetish without going down the sexual route though nobody is stopping you on that point. How about going the technological route?
Leather Lust + Technology = Gadgets Wrapped in Leather
There are high-tech gadgets wrapped in leather, which can satisfy your love of anything leather. You can try these:
Laptops with leather cases that you can get in the classic colors of black and brown as well as feminine colors of hot pink
iPods and USBs with leather covers that takes entertainment and information to a whole new leathery level
Just imagine your fingers caressing the smooth and supple leather while at the same time actually having objects that perform useful functions. (Sure, leather corsets and bondage equipment have their uses but you definitely cannot brandish them in public, can you?)
And to make your leather love even sweeter, you can always surround yourself with mainstream society-acceptable leather personal accessories like leather padfolios, leather passport holders and a leather envelope, which you can all get by clicking here now.
And the best thing about these leather items? You need not explain them to airport security personnel! (Or to your non-leather loving partner either)
So, be like me and go get ‘em leather accessories and click on the link above.
September 4, 2008 - Set Your Zippo to Your Bad Memories
We all have bad memories. We would rather forget them completely, shove them into the back of our minds, erase them from our memory banks, and generally just let go of the pain these memories give us.
Unfortunately, modern science has yet to invent the time machine, the selective memory eraser, and the mind burner. You can have amnesia as severe as Clive Wearing, whose entire memory was erased and who can never remember beyond a few seconds and then pfft, nothing. Then again, is life worth living when you cannot hold the good memories?
Fortunately, there are some things you can do to let go of the memories and let go of the pain.
Burn Them, Literally
Not your brain, though you probably fried it from thinking too much about ‘em bad memories. Set a bonfire in the middle of the yard, dump the reminders of those bad memories, pour gasoline over it, and set your Zippo to it (which you can get by clicking here, by the way).
You can choose to do a war chant around it, do a witch incantation, do a drama queen act, and do nothing. Whatever you do, look at it as a cleansing act by which you have burned to nothingness the evidence of your pain.
Step on It
Who would have thought that cigar accessories like your cigarette case (again, you can have these by clicking here) can be instruments of healing? Put the pictures of your memories inside it, step on it many times over, and vent your anger on completely smashing it.
Think of it as the Japanese way of throwing plates and stuff on a wall and shouting profanities, except that you can do it in private. And you can step on his face figuratively since you cannot do so literally, right? Then, you can burn it and burn his soul to damnation.
Talk About It
Okay, your family and friends might be tired about hearing your whines and gripes like a broken vinyl record. There is always the friendly neighborhood therapist and counselors to help you sort through your emotions. You can talk to your heart’s content though you will need to fork over cash to their pockets’ content. But hey, it will all be worth it when you do get over the something or someone that caused you pain!
When you do move on, look back at that phase in your life as a learning phase.
Many have pitched against the dangers of smoking. This is not one of them; rather this is about the obvious aesthetic effect smoking has on teeth. Think about it: When you smile and you’ve got nothing to show but yellowish teeth, you deduct dating points even from a fellow smoker like yourself.
To Quit or to Whiten?
Nobody is telling you to quit, not from this blog anyway. It is a free country where anybody can do his thing short of violating the laws, the General Surgeon constantly warns you against the dangers of smoking each time you purchase your favorite brand, and you have free will that nobody can take away. In short, you call the shots. (Or the smokes)
If you do quit smoking, you remove one factor in the yellowing of teeth. What to do with your Zippo and cigarette case , which you can get by clicking here? Well, don’t throw them away! You can always put these to good use – the Zippo for daily fire needs and the cigarette case for small cards and receipts.
If you cannot let go of your cigar accessories that you can get by clicking here, which I completely understand as I have addictions of my own that I simply cannot live without, you can always go for teeth whitening! You get the best of both worlds – smoking satisfaction and sparkly smiles. I mean, I have the same problem with eating too many chocolate and drinking too much soda, both of which cause teeth stains and diabetes. But hey! My dentist and physician are getting richer from my visits but at least all three of us are happy.
Teeth Whitening Basics
Before you go about using those teeth whitening over-the-counter products, know these facts. Better safe than sorry, eh?
If you are allergic to peroxide, hold off on the whitening products. This also goes for those with sensitive teeth, gum disease, cavities, under age 16 category, and pregnant and lactating mothers. Check with your dentist.
If you expect your sparklers to shine like the whitest porcelain in no time at all, let go of your great expectations. Continued eating of foods that cause teeth stains and smoking during the bleaching process will negatively affect any teeth whitening efforts. So, go cold turkey for a while as I did with my chocolates and soda.
In the end, the sacrifice will be worth the smile.
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