An Idol Mind

It's a Bird, It's a Plane, It's the 1st Mailbag!

Hi everybody!

So finally, after much ado, I've gotten around to posting An Idol Mind's first mailbag. Terribly exciting! These emails probably represent about a third of the responses I've gotten these past seven-ish weeks, but I tried to put up the ones that I liked the most. I also tried to arrange them in an order providing maximum hilarity. And I edited just a few of them for spelling and clarity, but that's it. ...Anyway, enough of this introduction filler. On to the emails! You will be entertained, I assure. (Warning: language has PG-13 moments.)

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"Jason Castro left! Jason Castro left! Ahahahahaha!!! This is perfect, now I can finally watch the show without wanting to tear my hair out! And his too!"

- Erin

"My two faves, Syesha and David Cook, are still in the running. Yay! I think David is my choice for winner. He can put a rock edge to any song, which is cool. I like David A. also, but I'm all for David Cook."

- Venus

"My money is definitely on David Archuleta! My younger sister thinks he's hot."

- Jen

"Archuleta is DETESTABLE. He looks like a hairless gerbil. Ick. Every time he's done singing I say, 'What the hell was that crap?'"

- Matt

"Syesha Mercado is good, but why in the world does she keep selecting Whitney Houston songs? Duh!!! Leave Whitney alone if you can't sing the same or better! And I'm sick of David Archuleta with his goofy awww shucks stuff at the end of each performance. It's obviously just a ploy for sympathy. Bottom line is none of these people are worth a hill of beans. Guess I'm spoiled from past seasons, though..."

- Frankie

"I wanted to kill that son of a b!tch Jason Castro and I am so glad he's gone. I can sing better than him, and I can play guitar better. Why didn't I try out for the show this year? I'd be where he is, but I would not messing up so much. Jason was a disgrace to guitar players everywhere and to all previous contestants on this show. Not only did he always forget his words but he never even looked like he cared! Michael Johns would have killed to be where Jason was, and Carly too. But did he care? Not even a little bit. What a prick move, I'm glad he's gone. By the way, I liked your burning sun metaphor, but I'm pretty sure I hated him more than that."

- Mitchell

"Your Carly entry remains my favorite to date... Glad to know I wasn't the only one who died when she left. I miss her SO much, it's unhealthy probably."

- Sewey

"This season of American Idol has been incredibly frustrating. David Archuleta's speaking voice sounds like he has already had a tracheotomy, or else a shovel to the throat, and his singing voice is scarcely better. Syesha is mildly talented, but it's telling that her best performance was during the Andrew Lloyd Webber week. She might make it on Broadway. (...Or as the fairly attractive singing girl at your neighborhood brothel.)"

- Audrey

"You're right, if Syesha doesn't learn to shut up she's not gonna be winning anything this year. Is there any social movement she's left out? Anyway, doesn't matter, I'm pulling for one of the Davids. But for idiotic reasons."

- David

"You need to seriously leave Jason alone, you're being an assh#le. He's never done anything to you, so stop insulting him! American Idol isn't about just singing, and he has more intangibles than everyone else combined. You're not funny and you wouldn't say any of the stuff on this blog to his face."

- Jodi

"Your blog is hilarious! I love reading it, please keep more entries coming :)"

- Samantha

"I'm Jason's number one fan and I just want you to know your blog is awful and nothing close to funny! Jason is going to be making millions with his 'coffeehouse' music while you sit at your computer and just think of more dumb reasons to insult him!"

- Nicole

"This blog is as awesome as Brooke (who I love)! I'm glad I found it, it makes me laugh all the time!!"

- Porter

"It's about time Jason left. God, he was seriously overdue. It's not surprising it came this week - even an amateur would be mortified if he forgot lyrics on the stage. There's just no reason for him not preparing better. Personally, I think Jason's biggest problem was that he struggled to adapt his own style to the songs he chose rather than choosing songs that fit his style. What do you think? The other contestants are more unique and deserve to be there over him. Just my opinion, though."

- Richard

"Would it be out of line if I said how freaking hot Syesha Mercado is, and that she should be on America's Next Top Model instead?"

- Joey

"F#ck this site. YOU'RE A F#CKING IDIOT, ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR GODDAMN MIND?? Jason is AMAZING and only a total moron wouldn't realize that!!! That makes this f#cking blog moronic. Oh and by the way, all your predictions have been wrong and your analysis is pretty much a waste of my time. Don't bother posting anymore, no one's reading. You suck and Jason will have a better life than you. If I ever met you I would spit in your face, and no I'm not kidding. And he is NOT a stoner! You should be ashamed. You are a b!tch probably and you don't know sh!t."

- Sara

"I'm so happy I found this blog! The first thing I read was the Mariah Carey post - your thoughts were so close to mine that I had to keep coming back for more :) Not to mention you are a very good writer and you've made me laugh out loud probably more than I can remember. This is one of the best AI blogs I've come across... hopefully you're not letting it die at the end of this season?"

- Falin

"...You do realize that Sanjaya should be in your banner somewhere, right?"

- Rita